What Would Homer Do?

Dangerous Move No. 1: Ask high school students to write--uncensored and without threat of detention or a bad grade--what’s on their minds.

Dangerous Move No. 2: Publish what they give you.

To celebrate the 0-ness of this year’s graduating class, we asked almost 2,000 Orange County high school students to answer these questions:

1) What would you most like to add two zeros to?

2) Complete this sentence: “Oh, Oh, I just. . . “

3) What’s been your most significant zero hour?

4) What would you most like to do in zero gravity?

You can imagine what they put down on paper. Some of them we can actually print.

In zero gravity, Patrick Kinmartin of Servite High wants to slam dunk a basketball, just once. Lam Nguyen of Century High wants to float freely to relieve everyday stress and worries.

And then there’s Alvaro Peraza of Anaheim High who was--D’oh!--among the multitude inspired by the episode of “The Simpsons” in which a weightless Homer chomps potato chips in space.

Here’s more of the feedback on that zero gravity question:

Do that one thing on the “Matrix” ’cause me and my friend Alex think that’s kewl.

--Daniel Jaimez, Anaheim High

Swim around in a bunch of floating money.

--Darrin Davis, Katella High

Make out with a girl because she can’t keep her hands off me or she’ll float away.

--Joseph McKellar, Brea Olinda High

Open a bag of M & Ms, pour them out and try to catch them in my mouth as I spin around.

--Lauren Lundvall, La Quinta

Break dance. Why not?

--Nestor Valenzuela, Liberty Christian School

I would most likely go round and look for aliens. I want to prove to everyone that they do exist.

--Ponnareay Pech, Los Amigos High

Play [skateboard champ] Tony Hawk.

--Mike Fipp, Mater Dei High

Exercise. Maybe it would be easier.

--Nicole Jones, John F. Kennedy High

There is no such thing as zero gravity. It is just an illusion. The feeling is actually constant free fall.

--Mike Ferketic and Haman Movafagh, Corona del Mar High

That’s none of your business.

--Matthew Hansen, St. Margaret’s Episcopal School